Holy Cow

It's incredible what you learn about the animal world living in India.  Not only are cows sacred - and have right of way on the roads - but in a stand-off with a dog, dog wins... in a stand-off with a horse, cow wins.  It seems ironic that one small animal (Mitzie) could terrorize one large animal (cow).  I witnessed a 'head to head' between the two of them on the street the other day and when things got a little tense between an over curious calf and Mitzie, the Mitzter came out on top, sending the calf fleeing down the street.  On the other hand, while out for a pleasant ride recently, my friend and I were confronted by a handful of cows which sent the horses into a flat spin and literally jumping for cover.  In fact, as the cows galloped toward us, we had to take cover in adjacent bushes and try to calm down the horses.  Clearly this was HYSTERICAL to the couple of young boys who were herding the cows, and they spent a good few minutes chuckling at these crazy white women in their fancy outfits cowering in the undergrowth.  Had Mitzie been with us, however, I am sure things would have been TOTALLY different, and we'd all be celebrating her victory over the herd and our more dignified handling of the situation!

It's a Dirty Job...

... but someone has to do it.  Yesterday, it was me.  It was a first.  Here's a quick guide in case you want to try this at home... 

You're Never Too Old...

... to get excited about winning a rosette!  I have found in recent years that all the motivation I need to take part in something (road race, horse show) is the promise of a rosette or medal - or preferably both.  I've never thought of myself as competitive in that sense but I guess I am now!

This weekend I took part in an in-house show at my riding school with three classes - best turned out horse and rider, dressage, and obstacle course.  Majesty and I practiced hard on Saturday but unfortunately the less sensible of the two of us drank a little too much that night and felt tired and wretched the next day, without a chance of a nap and baking weather conditions.  In fact, I was found by my husband late in the evening in Majesty's stable giving him a kiss and cuddle while he slept on, unphased.  At least he's not the jealous type (horse and husband!)

Unfortunately, we missed our 7am lesson, but managed the 10am one in preparation for the show at 3pm.  Inbetween times, we preened, cleaned and groomed (the horse and me) which is hard work with a hangover and a horse that looks at me as if to say, "Are you done yet???"

Perseverance and preparation paid off, as we scooped first prize for both the best turned out horse and rider AND the dressage test (the judges had low expectations!), and came second in the obstacle course, in part due to the fact that I was directionally challenged at one point, and finished the test off in reverse!  Overall, we were the champions of the weekend, earning the most points, and came home happy with three red rosettes and one blue.  

I think Majesty deserves more than his usual sack of carrots for carrying me so skilfully through the weekend!

Twelfth Night, a day of firsts

How exciting can one Sunday be?  Not only do I have to look forward to taking down the Christmas Tree (here it is in all its fake glory) but we had a day of exciting firsts. Firstly, among the firsts, was one that nearly made me cry - Majesty neighed!  As ridiculous as this sounds, we have had this horse since May and not a sound has passed his lips.  He has mouthed an empty neigh a couple of times - once I believe as an apology when we were reunited after a fall and he galloped home and left me - but never the real thing.  Today we had two.  It was like a baby's first words.  Only much less distinguishable.  And a little louder.  Secondly, among the firsts, Tom went inside one of Bangalore's up and coming hyper/supermarkets, the new Tata-owned Crazy Bazaar, or something like that.  He was amazed!  Three floors of very western style supermarket, and of course the obligatory meat department selling, among other delicacies, goat chops, goat hooves, goat kidneys - very neat looking - and goat brain.  Tom was shocked how small it was.  And there was only one.  I never thought goats were known for their cerebral matter.  Finally, among the firsts, was getting 'caught by the fuzz' upon leaving afore mentioned Bazaar.  The car park was full, so our driver parked off site and came to collect us when we called. He stopped for one minute while we got in on the driveway into the store and was pounced on by one of Bangalore's finest, complete with long-lathi (i.e., big stick!).  Much arguing ensued and we figured out that the fine upstanding Policeman was trying to fine us for parking!  Tom tried to interject.  As did I.  But he took our driver's driving licence and told us to meet him across the road, by his bike.  So, dutifully we drove around and prepared for the Dibble to give our driver a ticket (or demand an unspecified amount of cash in exchange for no receipt...)  As luck would have it, across the road at the Bazaar, about half a dozen cars were stopped in the same place, so our driver quickly said that he would pay the same amount as those cars as long as the Officer went over and fined them too.  There was a little arguing from him about him only having one pair of legs and that he couldn't fine everybody, at which point he caved and let us off, without even a Rs. 10 fine!  We decided that our driver is the best arguer in Bangalore - but in typical male fashion, he assured us that that title goes to his wife!  What a day!

From the Horse's Mouth...

If only horses could talk.  I'm sure they'd make a lot more sense than some of their human counterparts.  Not that it normally matters to me.  Here is Majesty saying, "How'd you like my new Christmas headcollar?"  See, without even speaking, I know what he's saying...  He lets you know what he's thinking in his own little way.  Like the time Tom told me, "he's telling you 'enough already'" when he (Majesty, not Tom) tried to take a chunk out of me as I struggled to clean his dandruffy mane for far too long.  Thinking about it, Tom does the same too if I'm preening for too long...  And the time that he jumped in the air and spun around a few times when he heard a firecracker; that was him saying "I'm scared, someone's trying to shoot me..." Thankfully Tom was riding him at the time.  And today, he seemed depressed.  The first time I have encountered my horse in a miserable, unhappy, head hung low kind of mood.  It all became clear after a short time riding; he was a little lame on one leg and lugging around my post-Christmas weight was obviously making it worse.  So, we set off back to the stables for a 'shot of bute' to relieve the pain and, I kid you not, a 20-minute heat lamp treatment, administered by moi, on his rump.  He was very patient throughout the process, looking back a few times to see what was going on, but for the most part standing patiently while I heated him up - and hung onto my aching arm.  In an effort to humanize the process, I even tried a little 'deep tissue massage' to help the healing along.  Majesty can now look forward to a couple of days of rest, perhaps some time in the paddock (unless like last time, he jumps out of his into someone else's and proceeds to start a fight....) and be fit and well for a Sunday morning ride.  Let's hope when he sees us his 'horsey voice' is the usual - welcoming and friendly - and not screaming "bugger off to the gym, lard asses, I need to rest up my leg!"

Classic TV

This is a very random posting, but for some reason, I got to thinking about my favourite childhood TV programmes.  When I was six, it was Black Beauty and luckily YouTube has the opening sequence right here  And the other was White Horses, and sure enough YouTube has it here  Now, if only Majesty would come and get me up in the morning!!!